up against the wall, why does love always have to hurt?

i am absolutely debilitated with fear right now.
social skills, oh social skills, and confidence....where have ye gone? you hide in the bottom of the bottle, but that can't be the only way.

trying to mentally prepare for seeing someone you haven't seen in a very long time is difficult. it's been three months and somehow i don't think the passage of time has really done much to dull the pain of it all.

i used to think we could get through absolutely anything but i dunno...we can't seem to get past this part of things. i can't get past it. or maybe i can....maybe seeing him is going to be a lot easier than i think.